My Dearest Friends at Engadget,
With this letter I have enclosed a large, slightly frayed chunk of styrofoam that we all thought resembled the prominent "t" in the Engadget logo - you know, the one wearing the cute Wi-Fi hat. We have no use for this item here at Joystiq, so we thought you might hoist it above your reeking desk-beds, or use it in another story about 3D printers.
Assuming this part of my missive isn't covered in little white bits, I'd love for you to once again consider my proposal for publishing select content from Joystiq, your sibling website that covers the video game industry in a more granular fashion than your folks do. We review everything in the spectrum between indie and AAA, find the best in the worst games, stream upcoming releases twice a week, and have no qualms about making an MIT professor talk about massively multiplayer Pokémon. That does not happen twice a week, but we can work on it.
Of course, the last thing I want to do is inundate your loyal audience with gaming detritus that they already know, so we'll pick the most relevant and comprehensive articles for Engadget. How's this one to start? "How many megapixels was the camera in BioShock? The answer will shock you."
Ludwig Kietzmann, Editor-in-Chief of Joystiq
P.S. Please do not publish this letter verbatim.
Hello LUDWIG KIETZMANN,
We regret to inform you that delivery to the following recipient failed permanently:
Technical details of permanent failure:
Google tried to deliver your message, but it was rejected for being "too game-y." We recommend fewer references to goombas and headshots to avoid this error in the future. The error that the server returned was: 1UP LOL 1337 No relaying allowed - psmtp (state 13).
That said, we'd, uh, love to have you over some time. Not sure when we're available just yet, but we'll get back to you really soon. In the meantime, why not just drop those hot Joystiq pieces directly on Engadget so we don't have to surf all the way over. Surfing is tiring. Uh oh ... we've dropped the facade, haven't we?
Filed under: Announcements, Gaming, Meta, Software, HD, Sony, Microsoft, Nintendo